Typing this on phone, can't edit last post.
Walked with Jess to polling booth. Stood outside polling booth for three minutes, cracked and went in intending to vote Green. As soon as I got in I regretted it, immediately felt ashamed and humiliated. Took my three ballot papers into the booth and ran the pencil down the boxes. I liked how it felt so I carried on carving languid pencil strokes over the whole surface of each paper. I was kind of in a trance, it was relaxing. I thought about drawing a cock on one of the papers but then thought of the poor volunteer counting the ballots. I drew a smiley face on each ballot instead, maybe it will cheer them up. By now I was totally calm. I folded the ballots, dropped them in a box. As I walked another guy walked in, he looked like a twitterer and I hated him in that moment.
I've always found premeditated ballot spoiling silly and twerpish, but this felt kind of OK. I realise as I type this that my account sounds a bit like accounts of people who self-harm.
Brilliant.
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