Wednesday 12 November 2014

Update from Laura Place

Hi all, just made some sauerkraut, first batch in my new place, thought I'd give you a quick update, interspersed with videos to maintain your interest.

Tai Chi / Taoism / Scholarship

Tai Chi is going well, really like the teacher. First whitey I've had teach me for any serious length of time, and he's really good - funny, likeable, focuses a lot on basics, not a hippy though. Encourages a lot of class interaction, the 90mins flies by. Good lad. Plenty of space to practice at home as well, that's always an issue. This video is what I'll be learning - believe it or not, I have actually learnt this and forgotten it, I used to do this in Hong Kong all the time after work, getting bitten by mosquitos and shit:


I have a little man bag that I take to and from work. On the way out, I read Taoist texts and contemplate the scenery. On the way back it's dark so I play Mario Kart on my Nintendo DS.

As far as scholarship goes, I've just started reading Latour's We Have Never Been Modern. Enjoying it so far! Will probably take about a year to read his complete works, then I'll start working on a PhD proposal - no rush to start it, but I want to continue acting as though I am an academic even if I don't take my PhD until my 50s or 60s.

Nine-to-Five

Fucking awful, spacesuit couldn't really take it. Terrible cultural fit generally and one manager is particularly toxic. Found out that the last two PR hires left after two months! I expected it to be like Hot Fuzz, i.e. that it would all be very amateur and the work really 'local' and pointless, but that everyone would at least be chilled out and self-aware. Not so much.

Anyway I won't bother with details, but I'm already starting to apply for other stuff - this time, outside of the private sector. It was just getting to me too much, but as soon as I decided to start applying for other stuff, the anxiety lifted and I can face going into work again. I also watch sumo at my desk after the boss leaves for the day. Go to 6:55 for today's best bout:



Tapestry / Brewing / Music / Reading

Tapestry being held up by equipment issue, I need to get a frame off my mum. Bought my brewing kit! Need to just research a little to make sure I don't fuck up the first brew, or at least, don't give away mistakes cheaply. And buy a big pan. Turns out my neighbour is a professional brewer with the Wild Beer company, which could be helpful.

Haven't set up music recording kit yet but have been writing songs in my head - seeing my guitarist on the weekend to talk about what he wants to do, have kind of been waiting for that before pressing forward. Still reading Runaway Horses by Mishima, and also have been watching Civilisation on DVD again.

I started to worry about being behind with various projects but then I thought 'fuck it', I'm basically just rolling along until Christmas, rolling like along the bottom of the sea when a wave knocks you over and the waves that come behind it keep rolling you, underwater but towards the beach... I have two weeks off from Dec 19th to sit up on the shore and shake the saltwater out of my ears, no problem!




Thursday 16 October 2014

We have a new place

It's Laura Place, about 300m down the street from where I first moved to in Bath in 1988:


Haven't actually seen it yet, Jess did the deal, moving in Sunday. Come visit!

Best thing is that it's near the Holburne Museum, which I used to hate as a kid but like now. It's just some colonial dude's collection but there's some fun stuff. Al was writing in his award-winning Yorkshire blog about the appeal of small museums, this is one of those - there are some genuinely terrible paintings where the artist has gone back and changed the head, or added a child to a family portrait, which is interesting from a social history perspective.

They also have some good Imari porcelain - stuff made in Arita, Japan for the European market and exported via the port of Imari, hence the name. There are also really bad renderings of Western paintings onto custom-ordered porcelain plates where the Japanese artists have become flummoxed by different artistic traditions of perspective etc. The V&A would have quite understandably binned them for space reasons, so I wouldn't have learned that fact.


I don't have a complete understanding but there's some interesting stuff about how the fortunes of Imari porcelain rose and fell because of economic and technological factors: first the Chinese got their act together and started trading internationally again, undercutting the Japanese, and then a factory in Meissen figured out the 'hard paste' technique that had been kept secret by the Chinese/Japanese - leading to situations where English porcelain makers were copying Japanese styles that had been 'Westernised' by the Japanese for export in the first place.

So yeah, let us buy some furniture and then come down!

Wednesday 24 September 2014

First tapestry completed

TAPESTRY

Got this starter kit for my birthday just to learn the ropes - finished it over the weekend. It's as relaxing and enjoyable as I expected:


The next one is a "proper" one designed by Kaffe Fassett and manufactured by the Ehrman people.



SAUERKRAUT

Made way too much sauerkraut - it's going a bit dry in the fridge, two cabbages' worth. Using a smaller jar now. I tend to drain a completed sauerkraut batch and keep the brine for the next batch, if that makes sense - I don't eat it right from the fermenting jar.  Might need to rethink that if it goes dry. One good thing was, I used one white cabbage and one sweetheart cabbage, interesting flavour. I told my grandmother I was making a batch and she advised adding a few whole peppercorns.

LIVING

Living at home is pretty good although I can't get a moment's peace. Just about managed to get through 20 pages of The Pasteurisation of France by Bruno Latour before my concentration was ruined for good and I decided to have a little blog instead. I read somewhere recently about silence being the most jealously guarded commodity of the rich, or something. Not anyone's fault, just thin walls and doors. I'm being very well looked after though, Jess is cooking every night and getting up at the same time as me (around 7.15am) to make me an egg on toast.

Jess is really enjoying her job at the Little Theatre in Bath so we've decided to find a flat here rather than Bristol - my office is right next to Bristol Temple Meads station so it's no problem - the commute in is actually really beautiful. 




Bath Spa to Bristol Temple Meads

The issue was really the money, it's £1500/yr (although we get 3% cashback with our new joint Santander account) but it's worth it for Jess' peace of mind - she's been juggling studying with all kinds of crazy jobs for three years now, when you get a good one that pays OK and doesn't take it out of you too much mentally, you have to keep it. 

They're all really nice there, it's a Picturehouse cinema but it's only part-owned and everyone there from the manager down hates the Picturehouse - Jess has been told off for trying to sell memberships, they genuinely thought she might be a spy from head office when she started there! So far I've seen Two Days and One Night, Pride and A Most Wanted Man and can recommend them all, especially Pride, which could have been terrible in a BBC/Richard Curtis/Guardian way but is actually very sensitively done.

PENDING

Tai Chi starts tomorrow. Scoping out rehearsal studios in Bath to spend a few hours working on some songs - no hope of getting anything done here. Will buy basic brewing kit with first paycheck in October. Probably playing a little bit too much Minecraft. Drinking levels still too high but trending downwards. Spacesuit intact. More later.

Wednesday 10 September 2014

Embracing change, uncertainty and dynamism

This is a canapé of an argument.



The people who tell you to see a "fast-paced, changing, uncertain, dynamic, global, unpredictable world" as a good thing - and seek to create change and dynamism where there was staid certainty - are usually the ones getting rich from the changes and the collapse of old certainties. This is obvious. 


By getting rich, though, they are in fact reducing change and uncertainty for themselves and their families. So they don't really believe that change, uncertainty, dynamism and unpredictability are good things. Like most people, they crave stability. And they will take yours away to get more for themselves and their kids.


Next time they start bullshitting about the virtues of change, uncertainty and dynamism, shove this canapé in their greedy mouths.


(Further reading - Ulrich Beck on the "Risk Society". Inequality is not just about distribution of resources, it's about distribution of risks.)

Monday 8 September 2014

Excerpts from "Personal Brand" brainstorm

Things to talk about with colleagues and clients:

Trends in PR
Football, inc. non-league
Design, Copywriting
Things happening in Bristol
Bristol business
Homebrew & Craft Beer
PR experience inc travel, in moderation
Nice things about SW

Things not to talk about:

Sumo
Socialism
Opinions about pubs
The Arts
My life, 2013-2014
Tai Chi
Cynicism about PR
Cynicism about digital / online / social media things
Dislike of Apple
Anti-materialism
Japanese literature
Home fermenting
Needlepoint
Exercise
Oxford
Travel
Preference for going out in London compared to Bristol
My band, past or present
Music in general

Other points:

Dress carefully.
Don’t eat anything too weird for lunch.
Get a new sticker for the laptop!

Thursday 10 July 2014

France 2016 and Russia 2018

As with all of my once-in-a-lifetime trips, I'm no sooner back than I'm thinking of how to do it again. We may as well start planning now, no?

FRANCE 2016


This is looking pretty good already. I'd particularly like to do the south coast - never been to Marseille. Bordeaux to Toulouse to Marseille to Nice? Maybe a camper van convoy? Or gites with swimming pools. Family style, big sprawling group, bring the WAGS and whatever kids might exist by that stage. Football an afterthought to general chaos. Finish up with one or two big nights in Paris.

RUSSIA 2018


This is grizzled boys on tour. Everyone pushing 40, most of us will have probably given up drinking by this stage but we'll go crazy and drink far too much vodka anyway. I'm disappointed to see there are no games played in Vladivostok - I like the idea of watching the first match in Moscow and then spending seven days on the Trans-Siberian, relying on train station kiosk attendants for the scores and manually putting together the tables on napkins. The whole thing will have to be done by train in any event, because A) it's more fun and B) Aeroflot. Moscow and St Petersburg are musts. Kaliningrad looks promising just because when else would you go there. And I reckon Yekaterinburg, just because it's the furthest east - I reckon people there would be happiest to see you. I went through it on the train, it looked OK. I reckon take a train to Russia from the UK as well, maybe stop off in the Baltics.

As I said before, though, I'm only going if they waive visa requirements, or at least get the visa application down to one page. I never want to have to fill that fucker in again.

BONUS: ENGLAND AWAY TO SAN MARINO, SEPTEMBER 5, 2015


I have a crazy friend who is obsessed with the England's qualifying campaigns, more so than their actual tournament performance. As he puts it, qualifying campaigns are more engrossing because there is an absolute (and generally quite reasonable) expectation that England will qualify - they just have to beat a whole bunch of teams who are not as good as them. That's what makes it so perversely, almost morbidly fascinating - you're just watching the team try not to slip on a long series of banana skins. It's a metaphor for a certain type of life - where you're just about holding it together, everything's basically fine, there's no reason for you to really worry, you're perfectly capable of dealing with this, but just a little slip-up will not quite ruin everything, but start to put a lot of pressure on you, etc.

Anyway that's by-the-by - the main thing is, I've always wanted to do an away trip to a European minnow, and San Marino is the next one we play. It would appear to have a gondola. It's in Italy, so in theory you could tack it on to a weeklong hired-cottage WAG-friendly holiday, but I almost think it would be better as a slightly pointless, not-really-value-for-money lads' weekend.

USA 2022...

Friday 4 July 2014

Song stuck in my head





I heard this song played live a lot in samba places, it was stuck in my head the whole time I was there - just realised that it's the ITV World Cup song!

Sunday 22 June 2014

Switching allegiance

Bosnia are out of the cup already!! Iran still have a faint chance so I think I'll get behind them. I hope Iran wins and loads of Iranians go crazy and drink illicit booze and play punk records and hold hands with the opposite sex and all that. I reckon Salvador will be full of Iranians going for it, leaving the headscarf in the hotel room and knocking back a few caipirinhas. Essentially I am making a drunk hipster neocon case for supporting Iran.

Brazil is exceeding expectations, although I am looking forward to heading up the coast to Salvador as it is definitely winter in São Paulo.

PS newspaper cartoon in Fohla de São Paulo: "Uruguay has done in 90 mins what Argentina could not do in 200 years: kick out the English pirates". Oooooh!


Thursday 12 June 2014

Closing Ceremony

The Countdown to the 2014 World Cup in Brazil is almost done, the World Cup starts today. I'll drop in from time to time to give you some updates, but the purpose of the blog has been fulfilled. I am genuinely surprised at how much I've enjoyed the discipline of daily updates, and how much writing has helped me think things through.

My break started properly when I returned from holiday in China last September. I tried to give myself space, space away from the world of corporate ghosts, in order to discover a new path. I became desperate at points. Ultimately, the magic 8-ball said, "Ask again later".

I have to return to the world of ghosts for a while, but I'm going to maintain a golden thread back to this space. I will develop technical skills in home fermentation, needlepoint tapestry and brewing. If these don't work out I'll find other technical skills, but they're a good start. I will read the complete works of Bruno Latour and continue to follow contemporary sociology. I will seek opportunities to volunteer in my local community. My emotions have felt closer to the surface in recent weeks, I want to keep them there - I will continue to read the modern classics of Japanese literature. Moving to Bath or Bristol will require me to find a new tai chi teacher - I will use this as an opportunity to rededicate myself to my tai chi practice, as I have become very complacent. I will continue to study the key religious texts of Taoism, even if my studies are hopelessly warped by my status as a Westerner. I will obey the Five Nevers as much as possible. I will halve my drinking. I will find a way to continue making and performing music. Hopefully, I will buy my wife a dog.

By doing all this, I will construct a sort of spaceship or spacesuit that will keep me well supplied with oxygen as I navigate the world of ghosts. This protective layer will stop me from confusing the ghost world with the real world. It will give me a fighting chance of eventually escaping the ghost world completely.

Thanks for reading!

Wednesday 11 June 2014

Housekeeping

UPDATE #1

I spent so much time writing this morning's post that I missed my train by three minutes and had to shell out £31.50 for another single. I took the 10.58 Overground from New Cross Gate to Canada Water, which was actually delayed until 11.02. I had arrived at the station and collected my tickets at about 10.45, but the 10.52 train to London Bridge had been cancelled. At Canada Water I changed from the Overground Line to the Jubilee Line. This is one of the quickest changes you can make; the design of the station has been praised by the CEO of Hong Kong's MTR metro system for its efficient use of space. I caught the westbound Jubilee Line train at around 11.12, at this point all but resigned to missing my advance-booked 11:30 train from London Paddington to Bristol Temple Meads. I boarded one of the middle carriages through the double doors, walked a few feet forwards and then turned to face the doors through which I'd entered. On a square-shaped train carriage I would have leant against the opposing set of doors, but as the Jubilee Line trains have curved carriages, I hunched over a little while reading some documents related to my imminent job interview. I would have preferred to stand right in the middle of the carriage where I can stand fully upright, but a man had boarded behind me and occupied this space.

At London Bridge, Steve Coogan boarded the train with a male companion. He was wearing a dark grey suit with faint, thinly spaced pinstripes, very similar in design to my own, as well as sunglasses. His companion was shorter and wore a beard: I did not recognise him. Steve Coogan did not move far from the door - rather, he tucked himself into the small space left of the train door, near the button that opens the door.


He faced the door of the train, thus using the aquamarine column that hosts the door-open button to obscure his face to anyone standing or sitting to his left. His companion stood to the right, in front of the door, thus largely obscuring Steve Coogan's face to anyone standing or sitting to his right. The only people in a good position to notice Steve Coogan were me and the man who had boarded behind me and was now occupying the central part of the door space. He had his back to Steve Coogan, however, and was thus providing him with extra cover to other potential onlookers. 

The train stopped at Southwark, and the man got off. I moved slightly closer to Steve Coogan, stretching to my full height in the middle of the carriage and continuing to look down at the documents I had with me. As the man got off and new passengers got on, Steve Coogan turned his head away from the door as people boarded the train, brushing straight past him. His companion tilted his body so as to subconsciously manoeuvre new passengers away from Steve Coogan. I was checking the expressions of the new passengers faces to see if they had registered Steve Coogan's presence, but they did not seem to. Steve Coogan and his companion repeated this tactic at Waterloo with the same results. They spoke in low voices throughout the journey, I did not pick up a single word.

I now believed myself to be the only person in the carriage aware of Steve Coogan's presence. This felt to be something of a responsibility, as Steve Coogan had obviously taken such care to remain unnoticed. I shifted my posture very subtly, under the guise of the natural movements of the train, to further conceal Steve Coogan from anyone over my left shoulder. Finally, Steve Coogan disembarked at Westminster, three stops after London Bridge. He stepped to his right and seemed to pause, half-facing the train, as if to allow the passengers a glimpse of his face now that he was safely off, and then continued right towards the exit. 

UPDATE #2

The interview went fairly well, I don't have a special feeling about it but the whole thing felt comfortable, I wasn't lost for words or anything. The people seemed pleasant, one of them used to work at my old company, although we didn't overlap. I was worried that a really bad interview would leave me stewing all during Brazil, but this was perfect - it made the future feel more concrete without unsettling me. It was also great to physically visit Bristol (on an amazing day for it as well) and go through Bath on the train, I felt very calm and happy about being there. I even had warm feelings about being on First Great Western trains - I'm suddenly noticing their "Be a Great Westerner" ads everywhere in London.

UPDATE #3

I just posted a really banal tweet on Twitter, which may seem to break one of the Five Nevers. It was purely for the benefit of the people who just interviewed me, who are probably googling me. From now on, you should basically assume that my Twitter feed is my Linkedin page. Don't judge me. What a terrible world, though, that I would feel the need to do this. 

Declaring for Bosnia & Herzegovina


I had a quick look at this fun graphic thing in the Wall Street Journal, the "World Cup of Everything Else". Iran wins quite a few things, e.g. most married women, most Muslims, highest consumption of tree nuts, highest traffic death rate. I also had an Iranian on my MA course and went to her Persian New Year party in the year when the Guardian was suddenly hyping being the only non-Muslim at a Ramadan party, which made me feel slightly ahead of the curve.



I think I kind of like Iran, it seems a case of good people, bad government. Even their (very unpleasant) government seems to have a sense of humour in how they wind up the UK and US, unlike, say, the tiresome high camp of North Korea. I like their food too, what little I've tried of it.

But I think I'm going to have to go for Bosnia and Herzegovina. They only win one of the WSJ's World Cups - unemployment, a staggering 44.3%. There were serious riots in Bosnia in February, dubbed the Bosnian Spring, which I must confess completely passed me by. Bosnia has pretty much been victim to the classic post-communist disease of having all the state assets sold off to dodgy characters who then strip the assets and screw the workers.

They also have a fascinating political structure: the Federation of Bosnia and Herzegovina accounts for only 51% of the land mass of the country "Bosnia and Herzegovina", with the rest taken up by semi-autonomous regions. I don't have time to explain it in full but check out the Wiki page. There is also the High Representative of the international community who can bypass parliament and fire elected officials - Paddy Ashdown was one for a bit. That office will remain until Bosnia and Herzegovina can prove that it is grown up enough to run itself properly.

So yeah, I feel like B&H getting out of the group stages will mean a lot to the country - they are also the only one out of them and Iran likely to even have a shot, and I'll be watching the final group stage match. So while Iran are technically the underdog in the head-to-head, I'm supporting Bosnia & Herzegovina as the underdog in the broader sense.



Also check out this flag!


I mean what the fuck is going on here? It's really long, a 1:2 proportion, very rare. I love the half stars on the top and bottom, thinking outside of the box there.

Tuesday 10 June 2014

Interview tomorrow

Interview tomorrow with a PR agency in Bristol - not a particularly fantastic opportunity but worth the practice. So far job searching is great out west, there are consultants who actually find vacancies for you and give you tips etc. Interest from two agencies so far although I can tell one has the wrong idea about me, I don't see it working. They think because I have been freelancing that I will have loads of contacts and clients that I can bring to them, when in fact I have really been working as a remote worker more than a proper freelancer. I don't know anyone!!

It's a good reminder that this isn't necessarily going to be easy just because I'm leaving London, there are certain gaps that I need to account for - particularly, the fact that all the work I've done pretty much has been in Asia, and in six years as a PR I've probably picked up the phone to journalists less than 20 times. Someone more junior always did it for me. A nice editorial job would probably be more up my street, but I'm not sure if they exist or exactly what they are - will take a closer look after the WC. I fly pretty much this time next week! I have a strange mix of nerves right now, partly job interview, partly World Cup, partly from a heavy weekend. To be honest I would have been just as happy to leave the whole first interview thing until after the WC but fuck it, what can you do.



Went to Stratford Westfield with Jess to buy some shorts and some summer shoes that I can wear without socks (those bullshit ankle socks always slip under my feet and drive me mental). Bought some shoes from Aldo that appear to be made of cardboard, glue and linen, not sure how long they will last - they might be espadrilles, I don't know the terminology. Had a can of Ting and some tortilla chips with Jess in the Las Iguanas overlooking the Olympic Stadium, getting in the Brazilian mood. I like the Westfield, it's kind of relaxing compared to Oxford Street or wherever.

God I love how boring this blog post is! Feels like a good sign.



Monday 9 June 2014

WORLD CUP WORLD CUP WORLD CUP

I see that the Guardian has now launched its own countdown to the World Cup blog, stealing my idea. It's finally dawning on me that it's really happening - I spent an hour or so yesterday watching previews on Grantland and getting into it. The Men in Blazers guys on Grantland are pretty funny, actually.

Flying next Tuesday, staying overnight in Paris and then over to Sao Paulo on Wednesday morning. Have done zero research into Brazilian culture or things to see - my sister-in-law and travel companion Lindsey has a Lonely Planet, I'm just going to go with the flow. I might go a bit more safe and touristy than I normally would in, say, China, given the crime and political instability - I'm kind of avoiding developing any kind of "must see" list so that I don't end up taking unnecessary risks. I keep reminding myself that people do actually visit Brazil all the time, it's not like I'm going to North Korea. I also have a contact in Sao Paulo from Goldsmiths who might be able to show us around a little.

I saw a great documentary at the Greenwich Picturehouse about a slum clearance project in Salvador, where I'm going to watch Bosnia & Herzegovina vs Iran (Lindsey will be leaving her Team USA scarf at home for that one), it looks absolutely beautiful.


The whole West Country plan is really helping as well - for a while I was worried that I wouldn't even be able to enjoy Brazil because it would be impossible to shut out job anxiety. I think it's going to be fine now, my mind feels much clearer.

Sunday 8 June 2014

Safe Disregard #9: "Once and Never Again" by the Long Blondes





This is the last one - I know Belle and Sebastian's later work pretty well but not the earlier, other than that I can't really judge any other bands with any authority. Let's hear yours though.

Safe Disregard #8: "My Heart and the Real World" by The Minutemen





Just a few more of these, I don't actually know that many bands that deeply

Safe Disregard #7: "The Hymn For The Cigarettes" by Hefner





Nearly put "Hello Kitten", an early single, but actually I think the tragedy of Hefner is that they never topped that song.

Safe Disregard #6: "The Beach" by Jonathan Richman and the Modern Lovers





This relates to Jojo's solo career, not the first Modern Lovers record which is a whole different thing.

Safe Disregard #5: "Cities" by Talking Heads





Talking Heads are maybe too big a band to do a safe disregard for.




Saturday 7 June 2014

Safe Disregard #4: "I Love You" by CSS





I think this is a great example - it makes total sense to say "I like 'Let's Make Love and Listen to Death from Above' but not the rest of CSS" - but I don't know how you could *only* like this CSS song and not the others.

Safe Disregard #3: "Transport Is Arranged" by Pavement





If you are undecided, try "Black Out" by Pavement.

Safe Disregard #2: "(Do Not Feed The) Oyster" by Stephen Malkmus & the Jicks

Apropos of nothing

Hakuho Sho, the greatest sumo wrestler of his generation, with a falcon:


Just discovered he has his own blog! I love this guy: Al once posed the great pub question, who is the best sportsperson you've ever seen compete in person, for me it's Hakuho and his great rival Asashoryu, back in 2009. A niche sport, obviously, but they are both regarded as the most dominant champions for a long time.

The most recent entry is very sad, he took some flack for skipping the most recent post-tournament press conference (he won his 29th title, the record is 32, held by Taiho, the Japanese equivalent of Babe Ruth, who died last year) but it turns out his wife had lost their fourth child on Day 13 of a 15-day tournament. Here he is winning on Day 15 - the crowd all want him to lose so that there will be a playoff against a Japanese wrestler:



Safe disregards: a less annoying way of recommending music

Looks like me and Al both woke up in the mood for music posts today! Looking forward to tackling his once I've had a coffee.

But anyway here's my very simple idea: recommending music (or indeed, any culture) to friends of our age is a delicate matter, as the very recommendation itself is often enough to put you off. What, another thing I feel obliged to go pay attention to?? But hey, it would be shame if we never talked about what we liked, or ever recommending anything ever.

I was talking to a friend who didn't like Breaking Bad, didn't really get it. I said give it a chance. He said he was well into series two - I said, give up, if you don't like it by now, it's just not for you.

This gave me the idea for a new form of music recommendation - basically, suggest one song that, if your friend listens to it and doesn't like it, they can safely disregard the band in question. This is really a mercy towards your friend, freeing them from obligation rather than putting more pop culture in the queue.

The song shouldn't necessarily be the best song, the smash hit - maybe the one that contains the band's most appealing characteristics AND more indulgent flourishes.

Without further ado, Safe Disregard #1: "Like Like The The The Death" by Silver Jews. If you don't like this, don't worry about Silver Jews.


Friday 6 June 2014

Between the Creative Economy and the Economy of Creativity: Resistance and Radical Contingencies

No just kidding, although I have been challenged and enlightened by my odd, not-quite-dialogue with Final Bullet. I had almost 300 page views for my first post and around 40 for the second, I'd like to apologise to all those people. Normal service now resumes.


My mum is staying with us and we've told her about Bath. This is pretty much locked in now. I applied for a job in Bristol on Wednesday night and the recruitment consultant called me back Thursday afternoon. It's a PR agency, we'll see how it goes. Their employee perks include "bar open on Fridays stocked with free beer and cider".

"And cider."

So yeah we're going to give notice on our flat in August and move in with my mum September and October before finding a place in Bath/Bristol in November. I'd really prefer Bath but it's about £145 a month in train fares to commute between the two. Bristol is a great city but I need time and support to deprogramme myself from "I'm not in London, I'm missing out" syndrome - returning to my hometown, my birthright, feels like a natural step as opposed to moving to another city and constantly squinting my eyes in order to make it look like Camberwell.

Anyway I have to go, we're all going to the V&A for some fucking reason. Christ that place is filled to the rafters with "maker culture".

;)

4pm Update: The V&A was heavy. I'm usually pretty impatient in museums, but this time Jess and my mum were going to the exhibitions and I wasn't - I knew I had two hours to kill on my own, no more and no less. Also I didn't have a smartphone. I spent an hour in the first room, the Japan collection, looking at basically every single object. Then I checked out some tapestries in the Britain collection, then the small contemporary photography show by the main entrance. I felt I had the time to do it, there was no better possible thing to be doing under those circumstances, I couldn't sneak out for a cheeky pint or anything, not really anyway.

Thursday 5 June 2014

Brazilian Portuguese phrases for World Cup visitors


GOLDSMITHS COLLEGE EDITION

I know, I know, it's bad.
Eu sei, eu sei, é ruim.

Yes, it was the same before the London Olympics. Many people were displaced.
Sim, era o mesmo antes dos Jogos Olímpicos de Londres. Muitas pessoas foram deslocadas.

I bought my tickets before the protests began. I cannot get a refund.
Eu comprei os meus bilhetes antes que os protestos começaram. Eu não posso obter um reembolso.

Football is the people's game. FIFA are criminals.
O futebol é o jogo das pessoas. FIFA são criminosos.

We are spending our tourist money in independent businesses in the favelas.
Estamos a gastar o nosso dinheiro turística em empresas independentes nas favelas.

We must all work together for a global socialist solution.
Devemos todos trabalhar juntos para uma solução socialista global.

Don't worry, I'll pay for these.
Não se preocupe, eu vou pagar por estes.

Wednesday 4 June 2014

Further unstructured thoughts on making and creativity

This kind of follows on from the last post but one, which was inspired by the Final Bullet post, but I'm unhitching the carriages on this train of thought, this post should in no way be considered as a response, intervention or critique of that post or subsequent FB posts, I'm just going off on my own tangent in light of my own stuff. And it's a dislocated thinking-through, not a step-by-step argument.

Why is creativity good?

I can think of two, non-mutually exclusive reasons.

A] It's intrinsically good, an irreducible component of a good life, in some kind of Aristotelean sense

B] It's instrumentally good, there are always problems to be solved, there are things that really should change and we need creativity for that to happen.

Like I say, these can both be true. Also, from each it follows that we need to nurture spaces for creative people and creative activity, because the logic of capitalism will probably rationalise it away in the process of eating itself. But which kind of spaces, and how?

For-profit creatives and non-profit creatives, something something reciprocity economies

If we mostly follow A], then maybe we arrive at a kind of reciprocal, gift-type economy arrangement where I support your creative thing and you support my creative thing, and thus we are supporting Creativity and alternative, non-commercialised spaces. That sounds cool to me, I think you can probably have that without everything becoming too indulgent and sucky, people can still exercise taste judgements.

If we mostly follow B], then at some point we need to reconcile creative spaces with actual prospects for problem solving or social change. We should keep a very loose hand on the tiller, but there will be an underlying logic of investment and return. Doesn't have to be financial investment and return!! But some sense that the common good will increase, outside of the exercise of creativity for the sake of its own enjoyment. There is a "for-profit" element.

Changing things vs inspiring change

I spoke earlier about the "unanchored optimism" of some in the non-profit creative community. I suppose I mean more that there is often a sense of deferred optimism embedded in the various projects, mash-ups, products, memes. Look at this thing I've made - it will 'suggest new possibilities', 'open up a new way of looking at the world', 'inspire new approaches', 'prompt us to rethink' etc etc. I'm being very broad brush here, but I think this is a common feature. It creates a kind of circularity, or deferment. "Do/look at this creation because creativity".

What kind of creativity does actually change things? Consumer tech. It changes things in mostly banal, sometimes terrible ways, but it unquestionably induces behavioural change among the people exposed to it. It is pushing us towards new forms of social relations - ask anyone who has internet dated. There is a perceived "for-profit" element for the user, even if that profit is literally saving three minutes queuing at Subway by ordering ahead with an app. And from that flows great financial profits to the for-profit creative.

Back to the reciprocal economy

I first started thinking about this after the very funny New York magazine takedown of Brooklyn's faux-hyper-localised culture, described as something like "a borough of 1 million people, part of a 21st century global financial and media capital, pretending that it is an 18th century village". There was a Brooklyn goods store that wouldn't stock Brooklyn Lager because it is made slightly outside of Brooklyn, and an anecdote about a guy wanting to make local Brooklyn pickles but agonising over the question of whether to import cucumbers during the NINE MONTHS OF THE YEAR when they can't be grown in Brooklyn.

Anyway this notion of urban localism seemed interesting - I wondered from an economic standpoint whether it would less ridiculous if taken to its natural conclusion. Sure, all the artisanal stuff seems overpriced, but if we were all artisans selling overpriced stuff to each other, would it not balance out? And then we all escape boring corporate capitalism by creating a new economy through sheer force of will - through a type of Great Refusal?

Almost certainly not for many obvious reasons related to the cost of raw materials. But the thought experiment becomes more interesting when you apply it to the economy of ideas and the economy of attention, where the raw materials are cheaper and more evenly distributed. Can a new economy of creativity be forged, through sheer commitment to the cause of Creativity and opposition to the reductive forces of corporate capitalism, that will operate on non-profit, reciprocal principles and spread creative legitimation and self-actualisation to the many, not the few? What are the barriers to this? What infrastructure has to be in place? What does that commitment look like? Does crowd-funding have something to do with it?

An aside: The Lost Lectures

A while ago I heard about the Lost Lectures, where you pay about £10 in advance and then they announce the venue, lineup etc on the day by text message. I was so excited by the idea I emailed them to be put on the mailing list, and bought tickets within minutes of receiving first ticket alert.

A few days before the event I realised I had been taken in. I was looking on the website at past events, it was all quirky speakers e.g. a man who went around the world interviewing people while they sat in trees. You know, to "gain a different perspective", to "see things differently". I was going to pay for the privilege, just because they'd wrapped some bullshit 'speakeasy', fake-scarcity ribbon around the whole enterprise. Just that week, I'd been for free to a Gresham College lecture where the UK's foremost scholar of Keynesian economics described in detail how classical economists had sewn up the academy and suppressed dissenting schools of thought. That really did make me see things differently! I let my tickets go unused. Tree wanker.

The commodification of inspiration

Is that the barrier? If you're not selling/promoting actual change, actual utility, but possible inspiration towards people's own self-directed, self-created change - a deferred optimism - will people pay money for that? Maybe, in some circumstances. But should they? Or is that against the whole spirit of the thing - should it be reciprocal? I mean, if we're just doing it to mutually reinforce each other, rather than trying to solve a particular problem.

Anyway I warned you that I wasn't going to build a proper argument and I've stayed true to my promise!




Tuesday 3 June 2014

Watching my iPhone 4 die

I got caught in a terrific rainstorm just now and my iPhone 4 got all wet in the pocket of my windbreaker. When I took it out the flash was stuck on - as in, the light on the back is continually shining, like a distress signal.

At first the screen worked normally, but insisted on being shut off (the "slide to shut down" thing appeared unbidden). This happened a couple of times. I left it for a while to dry, but the light kept shining.

For a while the phone became unresponsive - holding down the little button on the top right shoulder didn't do anything. Then, as I was on the train back to New Cross Gate, the screen turned on again - first as a very narrow vertical bar, grey in colour. Then it opened up into a lush blue pattern of vertical stripes, otherworldly and beautiful. I turned it over and the flash light was starting to pulse and fade, like the spirit was leaving the body. I flicked the "silent mode" switch on the left shoulder and saw that the phone was still able to vibrate in response - I did this a couple of times, as though using a defibrillator.

As I got home it suddenly made a text message sound, but the screen was still just a blue pattern, getting darker. It's sitting next to me now, the light still burning brightly in its final moments. I wonder what it is thinking about? Its life must be flashing before its eyes - its 14-year-old mother back in Shenzhen, its adolescence in San Francisco, where it was designed. Losing its eyesight through a scratched lens, and being replaced by a newer model. Shipped off to London for retirement, a period of quarantine before being unlocked by AT&T, and then a couple of years of faithful service before dying in a flat in New Cross.

Obviously this is a massive ball ache, but I feel like it's getting a dignified death.

Monday 2 June 2014

A loose post about makers and making

I've submitted a few things to Leila's projects in the past (hi Leila) and I've followed her career with interest, or more accurately, a kind of morbid fascination, like watching a tightrope walker without a net. I'm not acquainted with anyone else who is forging quite that kind of path - I know plenty of people who are making less money than they could to do something they love (or at least enjoy), but they usually do so within the framework of existing institutions such as charities, think tanks or public sector bodies. I also know people who are unhappy with what they are doing and want to be more "creative", but don't really know how to make the first step - they are just sort of chasing a fevered image in their heads of a better life, without actually working towards it or making sacrifices.

In the same week that I was more or less making peace with the idea of plying my trade in the lower echelons of the Championship, her post on Final Bullet about doubling down on the route she's chosen had a strange, refracted kind of resonance with me. I came across it this morning and have read it several times.

I take a light interest in maker/hacker/art-tech culture, mostly just by reading Boing Boing, those guys all seem to be roughly on the right side, but I find the relentless, unanchored optimism a little wearing. To read someone from that culture take off that mask and lay out so clearly the economic realities of a congested, under-financed culture (the economics of both money and attention), to criticise not just aspects of the culture but themselves, is exhilarating, almost shocking. I don't how other people in that culture react to this kind of writing, maybe it's not as transgressive as it seems to the casual observer, but like I say I've read and reread it.

I don't really know where I'm going with this, I need to get on with my day. There's no conclusion, it's just something that struck me.

EDIT: I should say that the reason I take a light interest in said culture is because it seems to represent some kind of vanguard or frontier (of what, precisely, I'm not sure), and there is interesting stuff happening there.

UPDATE June 3: I see Leila has not just read but linked to this post! Hi Leila - I'm sorry if I breached any sort of internet etiquette by not contacting you directly about writing this, but it's basically just an anonymous blog about my job search / midlife crisis with an intended audience of about four people. It didn't seem appropriate to comment on your blog post because (as you can see above) I don't really have anything substantial to say, other than that the ripples just sort of reached my pond. Anyway take care and all the best.

Sunday 1 June 2014

Godzilla at the Hackney Picturehouse

Went to see this last night, I recommend it! Watched it on a small screen in 3D. I always enjoy 3D for the first 20 mins and then totally forget it's in 3D, my brain just takes it into account.



We walked from Dalston Junction to Mare Street on the way over, along Dalston Lane so I could point out to Jess where the band rehearses. I haven't written about the band yet: basically we rebooted last November after spending three years as a project-y collective very much oriented to recording music on computers. We didn't play live, we couldn't actually play live as I was on both vocal and bass duty and can't physically do both at the same time. We all got a bit fed up with that, it was just a lot of sitting in front of computers and fiddling with music software, and of course we all became bad at our instruments because we weren't playing in a room together very often. So in November I moved to lead guitar and vocals, the rhythm guitarist moved to bass and the lead guitarist moved to a sort of rhythm/lead hybrid. We brought in a guy we know from our old school on drums and we rehearse once a week (annoyingly, on Mondays, which often leads to the "Test Match Special" of drinking on Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday and Monday nights). We have six songs and hope we can start playing live soon, just some little gigs in bars would be fun, e.g. the Bird's Nest in Deptford if they will have us. Like a New Jersey bar band, kind of, but sounding like Pavement. But most of all I've just really enjoyed actually playing songs live in the rehearsal room, drinking the obligatory Red Stripe and making a racket, feeling ourselves get tighter and tighter at the songs through practice. It's like the difference between working out every day and doing a token run once a fortnight, I guess.

We're losing a little bit of momentum lately - basically when you write a song in a (our) band:

  • Writing the first 25% feels great, that's the eureka moment where something clicks 
  • The next 25% is quite fun as you improvise and elaborate around the original idea in a loose, non-committal way
  • The next 25% where you start to hone it down is harder work but still satisfying, you are using your experience and musicianship
  • The remaining 25% is then just suddenly a massive ball ache, you disagree a lot more at this stage, little niggling problems just seem impossible to fix (and there might be disagreement about whether a 'part not quite working' is because of the part, or because other people in the band are not playing it properly), and often the original thing that got you all clicking in the first 25% has been changed or no longer has the same impact in the context of the rest of the song and everyone's just a bit tired of it. 

Anyway - we've reached the final 25% on a lot of the songs, and are kind of going in circles. Worryingly, not because we are at each other's throats about how long the solo should be etc., but because everyone is kind of shying away from taking the initiative on pushing forward their ideas for the final 25%, there's a lot of displacement activity. We're a bit older, we just want to have some fun and pursue our own personal musical thing, there's a danger that our relative lack of youthful hunger might see us run out of steam. It definitely felt a bit more vital two months ago, I was actually looking forward to practices for days in advance.

our rehearsal room in Dalston

Speaking of displacement activity, I had no intention of writing this much about the band when I started this post. I have to skip to the end now! I was going to do a whole elegiac thing about walking to Shoreditch High Street via London Fields and Broadway Market and feeling myself come detached from London. But anyway on the way up to the film, we hatched a secret provisional plan to move to Bath at the end of August. We might change our minds so don't tell anyone, we don't want to look stupid. Me and Jess are really bad at announcing plans and then scrapping them. But we will make the final decision on August 1, when we decide whether to give notice on our flat. I have to stress again that this is a secret for now and may change, I'm not supposed to tell anyone but I don't see how I could continue to write this blog without getting it out there, the blog is obviously part of the process getting me there. Don't tell anyone. Especially my mum, she'd be devastated if she thought we were moving and then we didn't. Maybe next week I'll write a blog post about why I changed my mind and am staying in London. This is how rolling news works!

But the job market out there looks reasonably healthy. For some reason the idea of working in comms - even, horror of horrors, for a PR agency - doesn't seem to bother me if it's in Bath or Bristol. I suddenly feel much more relaxed about everything: money, work, the future, everything. My wife can get a dog and I can get a Bath City FC season ticket.

People from Bath joke about it being "the graveyard of ambition". Die without perishing!!


Saturday 31 May 2014

So glad the sun is out

I wish I could take a day trip to the sea or something, but I'm meeting Jess later to watch Godzilla for free, up at the Hackney Picturehouse. Stef says it's really good. The charity I was doing the report for is having a community event today, I'm going to pop over in a minute. Maybe I'll walk to Hackney and meet Jess there, I could do with a nice walk.

I've had my second proper batch of sauerkraut fermenting away for around eight days now, it has a real tang to it - I think I'll take it out today and start a new batch. I might make a World Cup batch as well, put it in on opening day and let it ferment until the final.

The alcohol has been out of control this week, I'll try to take a break this weekend, hold off to Monday night band practice. As I've said before I drink more than I should, but I feel like I can genuinely say that I don't usually drink to relieve stress or "drown my sorrows" - but yeah, this week I've been pretty much doing that, I have to admit. Feeling on the up now, more or less - I've been actually knuckling down and looking at jobs online, mostly public sector / non-profit comms roles. Still get occasional waves of nausea when working on my CV etc but I think this is going to be OK.

I haven't given up on the idea of developing technical skills and getting out of the creative class, but I think that's just something I'm going to have to develop on my own. I think I want to learn how to make needlepoint tapestry like Kaffe Fassett:



There's a good show of his at the American Museum in Bath right now. I like how needlepoint tapestry is reminiscent of 8-bit computer graphics.

I might start home brewing as well - I've been put off in the past by the fact that everyone's doing it, and also that there is currently loads and loads of good beer available to buy, so there's not much point in making your own. Also my flat is pretty small! But actually I guess the process is the thing, more than the product. It's become so uncool that I almost think it's now safe to do it. I like that as an alcohol control idea as well, like I'm only allowed to drink as much beer as I make or something. Probably need to find somewhere other than my flat to do it though.

Non-profit comms work, needlepoint tapestry, home brewing, drink less, start applying myself more in tai chi. That should take me through to 40.

Friday 30 May 2014

My brother just quit his job

I love my brother!!!!

Sorry got to go, in pub.

Have a good weekend!

Thursday 29 May 2014

The Mysterious Wisdom of the Ancient Orient




"Knowing others is intelligent.
Knowing yourself is enlightened. 

Conquering others takes force.
Conquering yourself is true strength.

Knowing what it is enough is wealth.
Forging ahead shows inner resolve.

Hold your ground and you will last long.
Die without perishing and your life will endure."

- Tao Te Ching

I seem to have started talking about religion in yesterday's comments, I wasn't sure if that was going to come up in this blog.

A very long time ago I talked about being a philosophical Taoist, as opposed to a religious Taoist. I've since learned that the distinction is phoney and problematic - so-called 'philosophical' Taoism is an edited-down version of Taoism concocted by Confucians for Western audiences during the earliest periods of cross-cultural contact, with all the folky bits taken out to save embarrassment. A very rough equivalent might be reducing the Bible down to a couple of books centred around the parables of Jesus and his overall social and philosophical message while trimming out all the hard-to-swallow stuff about miracles, divinity, resurrection, prophecies etc.

'Philosophical' Taoism focuses almost entirely on two books, the Tao Te Ching and the Way of Chaung Tzu, which are more or less the central texts of real Taoism. Historically, there is a colossal amount of Orientalism embedded into the Western consumption of these books and Taoism generally - the usual Californian privileged nonsense, you know the drill: Confucius say, do whatever you feel like and don't feel bad about it. Many serious Taoist scholars pretty much take the approach that if you're not Chinese, there is really no good reason for you to claim any sort of adherence to, or membership of, the Taoist tradition, and that "Western Taoism" (for which associations and centres exist) is total bullshit and actually often patronising to the Chinese (the obvious subtext of 'philosophical' Taoism being 'we are doing it better than you, you illiterate and superstitious peasant').

Fair points all, and I don't think I would now claim to "be" a Taoist (first line of Tao Te Ching: "Tao called Tao is not Tao") - but I do claim to be a Latourian, and there is no question that reading these books, maybe ten or fifteen years ago now, had a surprising effect on me as they have many other Westerners over the years - that is, they have their own form of agency when translated not just into English, but into modern Western contexts.

This is not totally by historical mistake, either - scholarship suggests that the popularity of the Tao Te Ching across China when it first emerged during the Hundred Schools of Thought period depended in part on its delocalised, deregionalised, dehistoricised nature:

"The Tao Te Ching [...] is all but unique in early Chinese literature in that it does not contain a single reference to history or personal names of any kind. The speaker and those to and about whom he or she speaks are all equally anonymous, and the pronouncements of the text dwell in a kind of void, like so many timeless axioms, which is what they have often been compared to." - Burton Watson, introduction to the Stephen Addiss and Stanley Lombardo translation of the Tao Te Ching (generally regarded as the best)
So while it is almost certainly "inauthentic" to become attached to the two key texts while conveniently ignoring the rest of Taoism, it's not entirely surprising that these two texts, in particular the Tao Te Ching, have had the staying power and reach they've had.

It might make more sense to think of 'Western Taoism' not as a religion or philosophy, but as a historical phenomenon or process in which certain texts interact with individual people's values, worldviews and actions. Sometimes the person's ego is too strong for the text to infiltrate and influence the person, and the text is simply absorbed into that person's psychic armoury, and/or displayed as part of the person's outward-facing social armour. This is where it gets a bit Orientalised and culturally appropriative.

But sometimes the text is strong enough to change the person over time, get in there and start rewiring. I certainly remember reading the Tao Te Ching for the first time and just thinking "yep, it all makes sense now, spiritual quest over, cheers". It didn't change my behaviour overnight ("Accept your insignificance." OK boss!) but it's slowly chipped away and will continue to do so, I expect.

There is a notion that the official lives his working life according to Confucianism and then is a Taoist in his free time and in retirement. I think maybe I was hoping to find a way to go "full Taoist", get a low-paying job at a small firm, working with my hands, developing a technical skill, no office politics or any reason to use the internet, etc. Maybe this just isn't quite the time, I'm not ready yet, the path hasn't emerged. I'm only 33.

Wednesday 28 May 2014

Pretty deep in the hole here

Dawning on me that this just hasn't worked. I'm going to end up back in PR or comms, aren't I? Oh god oh god oh god. Deep breath.

Tuesday 27 May 2014

Freedom achieved, followed by immediate panic

Charity report and pub article filed, no more commitments, about three or four hours of satisfied relaxation followed by a wave of total panic. The phony war is over, the real job search begins now... let's see what happens!

Monday 26 May 2014

Sauerkraut breaking news

Just actually ate some of my sauerkraut in a meal for the first time - dumped it over some leftover chorizo and lentil stew thing Jess made. At the first bite, the thought "God is good" flashed across my mind. I think this is going to change my life.

Slow news day

I have a little radio that sits on my bathroom sink. It's analogue, and tuned to some random pirate station.

Except just now the station did an ident - it's actually tuned to Rinse FM!

The radio on my SINK... tuned to RINSE FM!!!

Enjoy the rest of your bank holiday.




Sunday 25 May 2014

New Commandments draft 3





Don't worry I'm not going to fixate on this list! I think this is now in decent shape. The ones I've taken out are not less important, it's more that I hope that by following the ones below, one will naturally be led to the others. In fact, I almost think that the coffee one alone could unlock everything. 

THE FIVE NEVERS

1. Never walk down the street holding coffee.

2. Never let anyone see you check your phone.

3. Never surf the internet to alleviate boredom.

4. Never use social media to address your loved ones all at the same time.

5. Never eat or drink in the most gentrified place in your local area.



The volunteering thing was a bit preachy, I guess. I'm hoping that the ban on going to the most gentrified place in your local area will do a lot of knock-on work - going to 'rougher' places, starting to take a more holistic view of your local area (i.e. not as a blank slate to be improved), maybe going on to then volunteer locally, if it feels appropriate. It's more about your attitude to other people near you than volunteering per se. 

I've punted on the competitive taste issue - it's hard to think of one injunction that will elegantly disrupt such behaviour. I'm hoping that the injunction on "broadcasting" and using the internet recreationally will do some of the work there. Thing is, though, I think we all do the competitive taste thing to some extent and it's not all bad, I suppose it depends on how "friendly" the competition is? Or to what extent you are able to detach yourself from your own tastes. But yeah, very complicated. 

New Commandments draft 2

Just editing down:

1. Do not walk down the street holding coffee.

2. Don't use the internet for recreation or to alleviate boredom, unless you are at work.

3. Only communicate with the people you care about directly, never address them as an undifferentiated mass. (aka Thou shall not tweet or post status updates)

4. Refrain from celebrating gentrification. Don't eat or drink in the most gentrified place on your high street.

5. Be price-sensitive: don't buy things that seem unnecessarily expensive.

6. Once a month, go eat or drink somewhere you think looks a bit rough.

7. You always look undignified when checking your phone. Never let anyone see you do it.